做任何事情都有適當(dāng)、不適當(dāng)?shù)臅r(shí)機(jī),機(jī)智就是要在適當(dāng)時(shí)機(jī)做適當(dāng)?shù)氖潞驼f適當(dāng)?shù)脑?。機(jī)智和禮節(jié)有很密切的關(guān)系,一個人不可能只具備其中一種而缺少另一種特質(zhì),機(jī)智是一項(xiàng)無價(jià)的處世技巧,表現(xiàn)機(jī)智和缺乏機(jī)智,同樣會讓人看得見。
There is a right moment and a wrong moment for everything.Tact is the habit of doing and saying the right thing at the right moment.Tact is so closely related to courtesy that you cannot practice one without the other.It is an invaluable skill,just as noticeable for its absence as for its presence.
以下是缺乏機(jī)智時(shí)最常發(fā)生的情況:
Here is a list of the most common ways people show their lack of tact:
1.不注意自己說話的語氣,經(jīng)常以不悅而且對立的語氣說話。
1.Carelessness in their tone of voice,often speaking in gruff,antagonistic tones.
2.應(yīng)該保持沉默的時(shí)候偏偏愛說話。
2.Speaking out of turn,when silence would be more appropriate.
3.打斷別人的話。
3.Interrupting others who are speaking.
4.濫用人稱代詞。以至在每個句子中都用“我”這個字。
4.Overworking the personal pronoun so that every sentence features the word"I".
5.以傲慢的態(tài)度提出問題,給人一種只有他最重要的印象。
5.Asking impertinent questions,often to impress others with their own importance.
6.在談話中插入一些和自己有親密關(guān)系,但卻會使別人感到不好意思的話題。
6.Injecting intimately personal subjects into the conversations when such subjects are embarrassing to others.
7.不請自來。
7.Going where they have not been invited.
8.自吹自擂。
8.Boastfulness
9.嘲笑社會上的穿著規(guī)范。
9.Flouting social norms in matters of attire.
10.在不適當(dāng)時(shí)刻打電話。
10.Making calls at inconvenient hours
11.在電話中談一些別人不想聽的無聊話。
11.Holding people on the telephone with needless conversations.
12.對不熟悉的人寫一封內(nèi)容過分親密的信。
12.Writing letters that are overly familiar to people they hardly know.
13.不管自己了不了解,而任意對任何事情發(fā)表意見。
13.Volunteering unsolicited opinions on any subject under the sun,without regard to their knowledge.
14.公然質(zhì)問他人意見的可靠性。
14.Openly questioning the soundness of others' opinions.
15.以傲慢的態(tài)度拒絕他人的要求。
15.Declining requests from others in an arrogant manner.
16.在別人的朋友面前說一些瞧不起他的話。
16.Speaking disparagingly of people in front of their friends.
17.指責(zé)和自己意見不同的人。
17.Rebuking people who disagree with them.
18.評論別人的無能力。
18.Commenting on people's disabilities.
19.當(dāng)著他人的面,指正部后和同事的錯誤。
19.Correcting subordinates and colleagues in the presence of others.
20.請求別人幫忙被拒絕后心生抱怨。
20.Complaining when requests for favors are refused.
21.利用友誼請求幫助。
21.Presuming upon friendship in asking for favors
22.措詞不敬或具有攻擊性。
22.Using profane or offensive language
23.當(dāng)場表示不喜歡。
23.Expressing dislikes at a drop of a hat
24.老是想著不幸或痛苦的事情。
Dwelling on ills or misfortunes
25.對政治或宗教發(fā)出抱怨。
25.Complaining about politics or religion
26.表現(xiàn)過親密的行為。
26.Displaying general overfamiliarity
如果你認(rèn)為這些都是一些小缺點(diǎn)的話,那就錯了。因?yàn)?這些缺點(diǎn)的混合速度是非常快的!你愿意和平常就顯露出三“種缺點(diǎn)的人交往嗎?這些缺點(diǎn)意味著,缺乏感受和細(xì)心體諒 的能力,并且會使人對這種人的智慧產(chǎn)生懷疑,任何想要培 養(yǎng)具吸引力個性的人,都應(yīng)遠(yuǎn)離這些缺點(diǎn)。
If these faults seem small to you,consider how quickly they compound one another.Would you want to be associated with someone who displayed just three of them regularly? They reveal a lack of perception and careful consideration that undermines one's confidence in another's mental powers. Anyone who desires an attractive personality will avoid them all.