Releasing the Past 往事如煙
導(dǎo)讀:你是否為你曾經(jīng)做過(guò)的事,或失敗的事而對(duì)自己耿耿于懷?
每個(gè)人都會(huì)在某種程度上有過(guò)這種經(jīng)歷。然而,如果你想要一種成功而積極的生活,學(xué)會(huì)釋?xiě)堰^(guò)去,不要為已經(jīng)發(fā)生且無(wú)法改變的過(guò)去而責(zé)備自己,這一點(diǎn)是非常必要的。
讓我們視過(guò)去為一種學(xué)習(xí)經(jīng)驗(yàn),和邁向未來(lái)成功的跳板。
Do you condemn yourself for things which you did--or failed to do--in the past? Everyone does this at some point. However, if you want to lead a successful and productive life, it is imperative that you release the past and not blame yourself for events which have already transpired and which cannot be changed.
你是否為你曾經(jīng)做過(guò)的事,或失敗的事而對(duì)自己耿耿于懷?每個(gè)人都會(huì)在某種程度上有過(guò)這種經(jīng)歷。然而,如果你想要一種成功而積極的生活,學(xué)會(huì)釋?xiě)堰^(guò)去,不要為已經(jīng)發(fā)生且無(wú)法改變的過(guò)去而責(zé)備自己,這一點(diǎn)是非常必要的
The successful person takes this approach: Learn from past mistakes and make adjustments in future behavior. The strategy of berating yourself for past conduct solves nothing and only serves to lower your self-esteem. You create a vicious cycle where negative experiences and negative feelings are reinforced, which leads to more negative outcomes and more negative feelings.
大凡成功的人都會(huì)采取這種作法:從過(guò)去的錯(cuò)誤中吸取經(jīng)驗(yàn)教訓(xùn),并為將來(lái)的行為作適當(dāng)?shù)恼{(diào)整。為過(guò)去的行為而責(zé)備自己的這種方式并不能解決任何問(wèn)題,只能挫敗你的自尊心。你因此而制造了一個(gè)惡性循環(huán),消積的經(jīng)歷和感受并再次被強(qiáng)化,同時(shí)導(dǎo)致了更多的惡性結(jié)果和消積的情感。
If you insist on dwelling in the past, I suggest that you focus on your past successes. Visualizing and thinking about past successes is an excellent way to build confidence and self-esteem. What you think about is what you become. Therefore, when you concentrate on your successes, you help to create future successes.
如果你堅(jiān)持沉湎于過(guò)去,我建議你多想想你過(guò)去的成功?;貞涍^(guò)去的成功是重建信心和自尊的很好方式。你所想象的也就是你會(huì)最終成為的。因此,當(dāng)你集中精力思考成功時(shí),你也正在創(chuàng)造將來(lái)的成功。
When you find yourself starting to dwell on past negative experiences, immediately halt and remind yourself: "There is nothing I can do now which will change what happened. I learned a valuable lesson and will act in a more constructive manner next time."
當(dāng)你發(fā)現(xiàn)自己開(kāi)始沉湎于過(guò)去的消積經(jīng)歷時(shí),立即停止,并提醒自己:“我現(xiàn)在這么做并不能改變已經(jīng)發(fā)生了的過(guò)去。我從過(guò)去中收獲了寶貴的經(jīng)驗(yàn),并將會(huì)以更積極地態(tài)度去面對(duì)人生。”
Regardless of what you have done--or failed to do--the only sane approach is to accept it and move forward.
不管你曾做過(guò)什么,有過(guò)何失敗,唯一理智的方式是接受你的過(guò)去,并積極前進(jìn)。